Magical People: People We Like Right Away

There are people we like straight away. We don’t really know them, but in this gray world, in which only light and shadow alternate, their presence is like a blob of color that attracts us, delights us and allows us to reconcile with the world. Science says it might be because of their smile, attitude, or warmth. But for many of us, their natural attraction seems to be something magical, something inexplicable.

The name Dale Carnegie may well not mean much to us. But this entrepreneur and extremely productive author of the 1930s laid the foundation for all the guides that fill our bookshelves today. One of his most famous publications is undoubtedly How to Make Friends .

There are magical people who don’t have to use tricks; there are special people who immediately cast a spell on us with their modesty and natural simplicity.

This book detailed for the first time one of man’s greatest desires (whether we want to believe it or not): the desire to please others. From the 1930s until today, interest in this discipline of psychology has only grown. Indeed, nowadays all coaches should know how to train their clients on the basic and essential tools with which they can achieve a positive effect on their social environment.

However, the most interesting thing about it is that there are people who are already born with this gift, with this ability to connect with their counterpart almost instantly in order to awaken positive feelings, trust and security. This spark, which leaps over spontaneously and triggers something in the other, is like magic that executives also appreciate, because you can use it to attract customers.

In addition, it is also a tool that everyone who has few social skills, would like to learn to better relationships and a better life to have more self-confident, in which he includes more friendships, find a partner and basically feels. As we can see, we are dealing with a psychological dimension that is extremely interesting for the subject of personal growth. Therefore, it is definitely worth analyzing them in more detail.

People who, without aiming or needing it, are immediately liked by others: authentic people

We all know that trying to please everyone around us brings nothing but suffering. That is pointless, useless and by no means healthy. But then there are certain people who, without any effort, without wanting or intending to, instantly connect with 80% of the people they meet every day.

Many would immediately argue that this is due to the physical attraction. Anyone who selects sales representatives or employees to recruit new members for a non-governmental organization knows better than anyone that it is not just that. It’s something in their non-verbal language, or it’s even because of what many call the “art of kindness.” In other words, it is the virtue of having an open and pleasant manner that helps us deal with others in a sociable, confident, and effective manner.

Now let’s look at what other factors all these people have in common who are able to be instantly liked by others without intending to be.

The Duchenne smile: the real smile

Each of us can easily fake a smile. We can smile at others in spectacular and compelling ways, when the truth is, sometimes that is the greatest hypocrisy.

But there is a certain smile that we can hardly fake and that is the epitome of authenticity. We are of course talking about the Duchenne smile.

It is said that the Duchenne smile naturally attracts you, inspires confidence and opens doors for the smiling person in any social situation in a very natural way. The associated facial expression is the result of the contracted large and small zygomatic muscles around the mouth. Both pull up the corners of the mouth and the sphincter near the eyes. The cheek muscles also contract and create small wrinkles around the eyes.

Modesty: the most attractive quality of a person

There are several factors that make it easier to instantly connect with other people. What is not one of these factors? There are people who talk to us about their private life at the first meeting, third people who are not present, who criticize, who are indiscreet, make fun of others or who continuously use the personal pronoun “I”.

We have all met someone like this before. The opposite pole to this, however, are people who achieve everything without wanting to do anything. Which immediately appeal to us through their natural modesty. They have properties that, like brushstrokes, draw a magical and extraordinary painting of this person.

Humble people know how to pay attention to others, show a real interest in their interlocutor, know how to listen, and give us warmth with their sincere gaze.

• We’ve already mentioned it elsewhere: Magical people we like right away practice the art of kindness. Their always open nature inspires trust so that we can open up to them naturally and with a clear conscience.
• Their posture, their non-verbal language is free from any form of power. They do not impose themselves, are not stubborn, but open and show closeness.
• Another trait of these magical people that we like right away is that they don’t complain, aren’t demanding or critical, and their demeanor is always particularly warm-hearted.

In summary, we can say, and do not want to forget to mention, that one can work on all these properties, even if there are innumerable people with this radiance or this very own light, to whom these properties are already innate. While it’s true that we don’t have to please everyone, we’re all interested in being able to connect better with certain people.