Living With A Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline personality disorder or BPD is one of the personality disorders that make the daily life of those affected and their families particularly difficult. It is a rare mental illness. It is usually diagnosed in people between the ages of 20-25. However, those with borderline personality disorder show symptoms earlier, possibly early on in personality development in early adolescence.

Although it is a rare disease, it has been studied very carefully because of the difficulties and problems faced in managing everyday life. Impulsiveness, great fear of abandonment, and a lack of emotional control characterize patients with this condition. We can safely say that BPS contributes to many problems in everyday life.

Hence, this article will discuss what borderline personality disorder is and make recommendations for those who suffer from it. The statements in this article come from working with people who have BPD and are in Dr. Marsha M. Linehan, an expert on this disease, understand.

Impulsiveness in Borderline Personality Disorder

“Living with borderline personality disorder means having a strong tendency to be impulsive, which leads people to make hasty decisions or to react to situations in ways they will later regret.”

People with BPD generally have high levels of impulsivity, but it manifests itself differently depending on the person’s mood and the situations they encounter. Living with BPD therefore means showing impulsive behavior and making decisions that you later regret. “It’s like living with a balloon in hand that can explode at any time,” says one person with BPD.

Also, those with BPD experience uncontrollably impulsive behavior that adversely affects interpersonal relationships and their professional environment. Negative consequences can also be traced back to hasty decisions that are made from the gut. All of this can lead to widespread instability that ultimately affects the patient’s emotional stability.

With this in mind , people with BPD need to learn strategies, cognitive, and behavioral skills in order to manage impulsive behavior. In addition, it is important that people with BPD know how to use positive and flexible affirmations when assessing everyday situations and experiences.

The insecurity caused by the fear of abandonment

Living with BPD is often synonymous with “not being able to enjoy relationships for fear that the person you love will choose to leave,” said   a 37-year-old patient with BPD since his birth 19 years of age. As a result, people with BPD tend to persist in their fear of abandonment while losing sight of the positive aspects of relationships.

The fear of being abandoned does not have to be expressed verbally. BPD patients don’t necessarily tell their partners, friends, or relatives, “I’m afraid you will leave me.”  Their fear of abandonment usually manifests itself in jealousy. Other forms of expression include seeking control over others, avoiding individual activities, and being alone.

It may well be true that people with BPD have had experiences of abandonment on a family or personal level. The problem with this is that they cannot overcome such tragedies and they tend to transfer this experience to almost every area of ​​their life. Therefore, it is important for people with BPD to heal the wounds of the past, manage the fear of abandonment, and reduce jealousy and control during therapy.

The roller coaster of emotions

“Living with borderline personality disorder is an intense life, good or bad.”

One of the main symptoms of BPD is difficulty controlling emotions. In relation to the real situation  , the emotions of those affected are excessively intense and disproportionate. Therefore, “living with borderline personality disorder is an intense life, good or bad” .

Problems controlling emotions often begin in childhood. Namely, when the children’s feelings are not confirmed, when they are told that their feelings are unimportant or wrong. They then fail to name and express their emotions. Therefore, BPD in adulthood means “feeling a torrent of emotions that can only be misunderstood when they come together”.

People with BPD experience the best and the worst of the world of emotions because of their difficulty controlling their emotional response. BPS therapy sessions therefore also focus on promoting emotional control.

Finally , it’s important to emphasize that living with BPD patients takes a lot of patience and empathy. As with all personality disorders, the patient’s fellow human beings are affected in some way. Therefore, if you have BPD, keep in mind that the people who love you the most often feel they don’t know what to do or how to help you. It is therefore advisable to seek advice from a professional.